The King of the Dark Chamber: Scene 8

Scene 8

VIII

[The Dark Room. The KING and SUDARSRANA]

KING. Do not be afraid--you have no cause for fear. The fire
will not reach this room.

SUDARSHANA. I have no fear--but oh, shame has accompanied me
like a raging fire. My face, my eyes, my heart, every part of my
body is being scorched and burnt by its flames.

KING. It will be some time before you get over this burning.

SUDARSHANA. This fire will never cease-will never cease!

KING. Do not be despondent, Queen!

SUDARSHANA. O King, I shall not hide anything from you.... I
have another's garland round my neck.

KING. That garland, too, is mine--how else could he get it? He
stole it from my room.

SUDARSHANA. But it is his gift to me: yet I could not
fling this garland away! When the fire came roaring on all
sides of me, I thought of throwing this garland into the fire.
But no, I could not. My mind whispered, "Let that garland be
on you in your death." ... What fire is this, O King, into
which I, who had come out to see you, leaped like a moth that
cannot resist the flame? What a pain is this, oh, what agony!
The fire keeps burning as fiercely as ever, but I go on
living within its flames!

KING. But you have seen me at last--your desire has been
fulfilled.

SUDARSHANA. But did I seek to see you in the midst of this
fearful doom? I know not what I saw, but my heart is still
beating fast with fear.

KING. What did you see?

SUDARSHANA. Terrible,--oh, it was terrible! I am afraid even to
think of it again. Black, black--oh, thou art black like the
everlasting night! I only looked on thee for one dreadful
instant. The blaze of the fire fell on your features--you looked
like the awful night when a comet swings fearfully into our ken--
oh, then I closed my eyes--I could not look on you any more.
Black as the threatening storm-cloud, black as the shoreless sea
with the spectral red tint of twilight on its tumultuous waves!

KING. Have I not told you before that one cannot bear my sight
unless one is already prepared for me? One would want to run
away from me to the ends of the earth. Have I not seen this
times without number? That is why I wanted to reveal myself to
you slowly and gradually, not all too sudden.

SUDARSHANA. But sin came and destroyed all your hopes--the very
possibility of a union with you has now become unthinkable to me.

KING. It will be possible in time, my Queen. The utter and
bleak blackness that has to-day shaken you to your soul with fear
will one day be your solace and salvation. What else can my love
exist for?

SUDARSHANA. It cannot be, it is not possible. What will your
love only do? My love has now turned away from you.
Beauty has cast its spell on me--this frenzy, this intoxication
will never leave me--it has dazzled and fired my eyes, it has
thrown its golden glamour over my very dreams! I have told you
all now--punish me as you like.

KING. The punishment has already begun.

SUDARSHANA. But if you do not cast me off. I will leave you

KING. You have the utmost liberty to do as you like.

SUDARSHANA. I cannot bear your presence! My heart is angry at
you. Why did you--but what have you done to me? ... Why are
you like this? Why did they tell me you were fair and handsome?
Thou art black, black as night--I shall never, I can never, like
you. I have seen what I love--it is soft as cream, delicate as
the shirisha flower, beautiful as a butterfly.

KING. It is false as a mirage, empty as a bubble.

SUDARSHANA. Let it be--but I cannot stand near you--I simply
cannot! I must fly away from here. Union with you, it cannot be
possible! It cannot be anything but a false union--my mind must
inevitably turn away from you.

KING. Will you not even try a little?

SUDARSHANA. I have been trying since yesterday--but the more I
try, the more rebellious does my heart become. If I stay with
you I shall constantly be pursued and hounded by the thought that
I am impure, that I am false and faithless.

KING. Well then, you can go as far from me as you like.

SUDARSHANA. I cannot fly away from you--just because you do not
prevent my going. Why do you not hold me back, hold me by the
hair, saying, "You shall not go"? Why do you not strike me? Oh,
punish me, strike me, beat me with violent hands! But your
unresisting silence makes me wild--oh, I cannot bear it!

KING. How do you think that I am really silent? How do you know
that I am not trying to keep you back?

SUDARSHANA. Oh, no, no !--I cannot bear this--tell me aloud,
command me with the voice of thunder, compel me with words that
will drown everything else in my ears--do not let me off so
easily, so mildly!

KING. I shall leave you free, but why should I let you break
away from me?

SUDARSHANA. You will not let me? Well then, I must go!

KING. Go then!

SUDARSHANA. Then I am not to blame at all. You could have held
me back by force, but you did not! You have not hindered me--and
now I shall go away. Command your sentinels to prevent my going.

KING. No one will stand in your way. You can go as free as the
broken storm-cloud driven by the tempest.

SUDARSHANA. I can resist no more--something in me is impelling
me forward--I am breaking away from my anchor! Perhaps I shall
sink, but I shall return no more. [She rushes out.]

[Enter SURANGAMA, who sings]

SURANGAMA. What will of thine is this that sends me afar! Again
shall I come back at thy feet from all my wanderings. It is thy
love that feigns this neglect--thy caressing hands are pushing me
away--to draw me back to thy arms again! O my King, what is this
game that thou art playing throughout thy kingdom?

SUDARSHANA. [re-entering] King, O King!

SURANGAMA. He has gone away.

SUDARSHANA. Gone away? Well then, ... then he has cast me off
for good! I have come back, but he could not wait a single
instant for me! Very well, then, I am now perfectly free.
Surangama, did he ask you to keep me back?

SURANGAMA. No, he said nothing.

SUDARSHANA. Why should he say anything? Why should he care for
me? ... I am then free, perfectly free. But, Surangama, I
wanted to ask one thing of the King, but could not utter it in
his presence. Tell me if he has punished the prisoners with
death.

SURANGAMA. Death? My King never punishes with death.

SUDARSHANA. What has he done to them, then?

SURANGAMA. He has set them at liberty. Kanchi has acknowledged
his defeat and gone back to his kingdom.

SUDARSHANA. Ah, what a relief!

SURANGAMA. My Queen, I have one prayer to make to you.

SUDARSHANA. You will not have to utter your prayer in words,
Surangama. Whatever jewellery and ornaments the King gave me, I
leave to you--I am not worthy to wear them now.

SURANGAMA. No, I do not want them, my Queen. My master has
never given me any ornaments to wear--my unadorned plainness is
good enough for me. He has not given me anything of which I can
boast before people.

SUDARSHANA. What do you want of me then?

SURANGAMA. I too shall go with you, my Queen.

SUDARSHANA. Consider what you are saying; you are wanting to
leave your master. What a prayer for you to make!

SURANGAMA. I shall not go far from him--when you are going out
unguarded he will be with you, close by your side.

SUDARSHANA. You are talking nonsense, my child. I wanted to
take Rohini with me, but she would not come. What gives you
courage enough to wish to come with me?

SURANGAMA. I have got neither courage nor strength. But I shall
go--courage will come of itself, and strength too will come.

SUDARSHANA. No, I cannot take you with me; your presence will
constantly remind me of my shame; I shall not be able to endure
that.

SURANGAMA. O my Queen, I have made all your good and all your
evil my own as well; will you treat me as a stranger still? I
must go with you.

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