Willie Wastle: Willie Wastle

Willie Wastle

Tune--"_The eight men of Moidart._"

[The person who is raised to the disagreeable elevation of heroine of
this song, was, it is said, a farmer's wife of the old school of
domestic care and uncleanness, who lived nigh the poet, at Ellisland.]

I.
    Willie Wastle dwalt on Tweed,
      The spot they call'd it Linkum-doddie.
    Willie was a wabster guid,
      Cou'd stown a clue wi' onie bodie;
    He had a wife was dour and din,
      O Tinkler Madgie was her mither;
    Sic a wife as Willie had,
      I wad nae gie a button for her.
II.
    She has an e'e--she has but ane,
      The cat has twa the very colour;
    Five rusty teeth, forbye a stump,
      A clapper-tongue wad deave a miller:
    A whiskin' beard about her mou',
      Her nose and chin they threaten ither--
    Sic a wife as Willie had,
      I wad nae gie a button for her.
III.
    She's bow hough'd, she's hem shinn'd,
      A limpin' leg, a hand-breed shorter;
    She's twisted right, she's twisted left,
      To balance fair in ilka quarter:
    She has a hump upon her breast,
      The twin o' that upon her shouther--
    Sic a wife as Willie had,
      I wad nae gie a button for her.
IV.
    Auld baudrans by the ingle sits,
      An' wi' her loof her face a-washin';
    But Willie's wife is nae sae trig,
      She dights her grunzie wi' a hushion.
    Her walie nieves like midden-creels,
      Her face wad fyle the Logan-Water--
    Sic a wife as Willie had,
      I wad nae gie a button for her.

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