Love for Love: Scene V.
Scene V.
FORESIGHT, and SIR SAMPSON LEGEND with a paper.
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
Nor no more to be done, old boy; that's plain--here 'tis,
I have it in my hand, old Ptolomey, I'll make the ungracious
prodigal know who begat him; I will, old Nostrodamus. What, I
warrant my son thought nothing belonged to a father but forgiveness
and affection; no authority, no correction, no arbitrary power;
nothing to be done, but for him to offend and me to pardon. I
warrant you, if he danced till doomsday he thought I was to pay the
piper. Well, but here it is under black and white, signatum,
sigillatum, and deliberatum; that as soon as my son Benjamin is
arrived, he's to make over to him his right of inheritance. Where's
my daughter that is to be?--Hah! old Merlin! body o' me, I'm so glad
I'm revenged on this undutiful rogue.
FORESIGHT
Odso, let me see; let me see the paper. Ay, faith and troth,
here 'tis, if it will but hold. I wish things were done, and the
conveyance made. When was this signed, what hour? Odso, you should
have consulted me for the time. Well, but we'll make haste -
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
Haste, ay, ay; haste enough. My son Ben will be in town
to-night. I have ordered my lawyer to draw up writings of
settlement and jointure--all shall be done to-night. No matter for
the time; prithee, brother Foresight, leave superstition. Pox o'
the time; there's no time but the time present, there's no more to
be said of what's past, and all that is to come will happen. If the
sun shine by day, and the stars by night, why, we shall know one
another's faces without the help of a candle, and that's all the
stars are good for.
FORESIGHT
How, how? Sir Sampson, that all? Give me leave to
contradict you, and tell you you are ignorant.
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
I tell you I am wise; and sapiens dominabitur astris;
there's Latin for you to prove it, and an argument to confound your
Ephemeris.--Ignorant! I tell you, I have travelled old Fircu, and
know the globe. I have seen the antipodes, where the sun rises at
midnight, and sets at noon-day.
FORESIGHT
But I tell you, I have travelled, and travelled in the
celestial spheres, know the signs and the planets, and their houses.
Can judge of motions direct and retrograde, of sextiles, quadrates,
trines and oppositions, fiery-trigons and aquatical-trigons. Know
whether life shall be long or short, happy or unhappy, whether
diseases are curable or incurable. If journeys shall be prosperous,
undertakings successful, or goods stolen recovered; I know -
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
I know the length of the Emperor of China's foot; have
kissed the Great Mogul's slippers, and rid a-hunting upon an
elephant with a Cham of Tartary. Body o' me, I have made a cuckold
of a king, and the present majesty of Bantam is the issue of these
loins.
FORESIGHT
I know when travellers lie or speak truth, when they don't
know it themselves.
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
I have known an astrologer made a cuckold in the
twinkling of a star; and seen a conjurer that could not keep the
devil out of his wife's circle.
FORESIGHT
What, does he twit me with my wife too? I must be better
informed of this. [Aside.] Do you mean my wife, Sir Sampson?
Though you made a cuckold of the king of Bantam, yet by the body of
the sun -
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
By the horns of the moon, you would say, brother
Capricorn.
FORESIGHT
Capricorn in your teeth, thou modern Mandeville; Ferdinand
Mendez Pinto was but a type of thee, thou liar of the first
magnitude. Take back your paper of inheritance; send your son to
sea again. I'll wed my daughter to an Egyptian mummy, e'er she
shall incorporate with a contemner of sciences, and a defamer of
virtue.
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
Body o' me, I have gone too far; I must not provoke
honest Albumazar: --an Egyptian mummy is an illustrious creature, my
trusty hieroglyphic; and may have significations of futurity about
him; odsbud, I would my son were an Egyptian mummy for thy sake.
What, thou art not angry for a jest, my good Haly? I reverence the
sun, moon and stars with all my heart. What, I'll make thee a
present of a mummy: now I think on't, body o' me, I have a shoulder
of an Egyptian king that I purloined from one of the pyramids,
powdered with hieroglyphics, thou shalt have it brought home to thy
house, and make an entertainment for all the philomaths, and
students in physic and astrology in and about London.
FORESIGHT
But what do you know of my wife, Sir Sampson?
SIR SAMPSON LEGEND
Thy wife is a constellation of virtues; she's the moon,
and thou art the man in the moon. Nay, she is more illustrious than
the moon; for she has her chastity without her inconstancy: 'sbud I
was but in jest.